nicks weird and wonderful writings

[nick]

Endured immortality

The lifeblood drips
It is so sweet upon my lips
The thrust recedes
I have fulfilled my needs

This life I endure
How I long for more
How I long for less
Less is more I guess
My life is so long
Life is but a never-ending song

I never value time
My moments are not rare
Some thing without measure
Has no value
Air is only worth anything
When you are without

The fabled weaknesses of my creed
Lies to give value, to give hope
To make the end seen real

But
The cross
Did
Not
Burn

The sun did not kill
Only burn
Only hurt


The stake did not kill >

The cuts heal
The skin repairs
My life continues
My suffering continues
My soul remains
It screams at what I have done
At what I must do
How I envy them
I give them a gift
A death
And end
Such luxury


Bit I am a song that will never end
My wounds will always mend
I must endure
But I know not what for

How I long to die
Release my souls sigh
Bring the dark
Leave not a mark

I am a bloodsucker
I am a vampire
I am a daemon
I am a man
I am a shell
This is my only request
My only desire
My only hope
To die

[nick]

New beginnings, old emotions.

Is a start really a start?
How far back do you look?
It was a new start for me
I saw her
I was ready for a change

Something to fill the shell
We aren’t meant to be alone
And I am so lonely

The pains of before still hurt
Of love given, and not received
It clouds my mind
I see her all around

The emotions still run hot
It hasn’t been that long
I cannot move on
Is an end really an end?
Emotions remain

(note - before moving on, read this upside down, the last line is the first and the first is the last, see the poem within the poem.)

[nick]

Love

Defined as warm affection, attachment, liking or fondness.
What is love?
It can try, but it escapes my best guess.
I know only what it does to me.

It separates me from a world of sorrow
It separates me from all my fears
It makes you the center of my world
It makes sane men act as fools
It becomes the air you breath
It becomes the essence of your life
It fills my heart with joy
It fills my head with song

But for all my love of you
You did not love me
You cared for me
You didn’t want to hurt me
You left me
So I remain, along, broken, empty

I would hate you if I didn’t love you
I would hate you if I didn’t understand you
I know you wanted to love me
I know that you realised you didn’t
I know you could bear the idea of me wasting my love
I know why you did it

I cant forgive you
I cant befriend you
I cant talk to you
I cant see you
I cant know you

Because I love you
And you cannot love me
So I know I have failed
I have lost what means most to me
It may not be my fault
But it is my failure
And I cannot stand to see that failure before me

So this is the end
Our final word
The final look

That final awkward silence
The space were ‘I love you’ used to be